Pretty Boy Ravio's Journal
by DrBadassPhD
Summary: Link has never felt quite comfortable in his own skin. He copes with this during his personal time, but what happens when that personal time is interrupted by Ravio? The second chapter is a journal entry by Ravio. Lorule and Hyrule were both saved, but does that necessarily mean all is well? It seems there are still loose ends to be tied.
1. Pretty Boy

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Link was a pretty boy. A very pretty boy with a delicate, enchanting face. His golden hair was soft and thick, cut somewhat short but with voluminous bangs and adorable, lengthy sidelocks. The glowing, smooth skin of his fair cheeks was outshined only by his doe-like blue eyes. Like his long Hylian ears, his dainty nose came to elegant, slightly upturned point at its tip. As a child, his soft features were often attributed to his youth, but at the age of 15 he now concluded that he quite simply, naturally… looked like a girl. Although he privately thought his delicate appearance was alluring, years of teasing had convinced him that no amount of beauty could make his face acceptable on a male. In fact, being beautiful was the problem. He wasn't supposed to look like this, no matter how much he liked what the goddesses had given him.

Slumping through the doorway of his small house, Link didn't feel remotely beautiful at the moment. All he felt was tired and sore. Almost as soon as the door clicked shut behind him, he let out a relieved sigh and flopped face-down onto the purple carpet. He closed his eyes. _One more Sage to go,_ he thought to himself, _I just need a good night's rest. Then, tomorrow, I'll start on that last dungeon. It'll be over._ He smiled softly. Although he felt that he would rather be collapsed on his bed or at least a futon, it was nice to at least have a thick carpet beneath him and a roof over his head after a long day of adventuring. The summer night's air was soothing, the crickets were chirping, and it smelled like home… _It's quiet,_ he contentedly thought, s _o unusually peaceful…_

His eyes snapped open. _Where's Ravio?_ He jumped back to his feet and spun around, expecting to see a lounging purple figure, perhaps snoring away his newfound "retired" life. The room appeared to be empty except for himself. Link felt somewhat annoyed; he had grown fond of his charismatic roommate despite his pushiness, and had come to look forward to Ravio's usual "Welcome back, Mr. Hero!" each time he returned home. It was Ravio's cheery attitude that kept his own spirits up, and Ravio's incessant rambling that distracted him from the fears that crept unbidden into his thoughts during quiet nights. He had almost died on several occasions over the course of his quest, but each time he woke up ready to throw in the towel, Ravio was there encouraging him to get back up and keep moving forward. _Hmmm,_ Link considered thoughtfully, _I suppose if I'm getting this annoyed, maybe it's because I've come to take Ravio's friendship for granted. It's not like he's obligated to stick around waiting for me, particularly now that I've bought out his shop. The goddesses know he's likely been bored in my humble little home, so perhaps he's gone out for the night. Speaking of which, maybe I should take a night to myself too…_

He blushed a little and smiled softly, feeling slightly torn. Do heroes get nights off? He had been constantly on the go for the past three weeks, running from one corner of the two kingdoms and back and pulling all kinds of dangerous, demanding stunts while he was at it. It wasn't as if he was up to rescuing that last Sage right this second, so if he was going to stay at home anyway he may as well have some "Link time." His blush deepened; what if Ravio came home while he was still…? His "Link time" was so strange and private, not a soul in Hyrule knew about it, although he used to have "Link time" almost every day. It made him feel so happy, so pretty, so much more like himself than he felt during his daily life… and it had been so long. _If Ravio has gone out, he'll likely be away for hours yet,_ Link resolved, _and if he comes back early, I'll just quickly duck behind the table. He always keeps that weird hood over his face, anyway; he won't see a thing._

After a quick wash in the river, Link was back inside, feeling nervous but excited. He resolutely closed the door behind him and turned the lock with a soft click. _That'll delay him a bit when he comes back…_ Now smiling, he peered around the room in search of… aha, there it was. Ravio had shoved his small white vanity behind the back table. Awkwardly leaning over the table, he firmly grasped it in both hands and with a heave and a grunt managed to pull the heavy piece of furniture straight up. One of the long, gracefully curved legs knocked one of Ravio's "SOLD OUT" signs to ground as he lifted it over the table. After setting the vanity down against the front wall and straightening its large ovular mirror, Link carefully replaced the sign he had knocked down. He then extracted a small white stool, a little worn but still sturdy, and set it down in front of the vanity, feeling a little giddy.

He sat down and examined his face in the mirror, eyes critical but lips smiling. "You're alone now, and it's Link time," he softly addressed his reflection, "No more considering what others may think. You can just enjoy being yourself now. You can appreciate yourself." He sighed quietly. "Tonight, you can simply _be_ yourself."

He stood up and once again marched over to the back table. Squatting down and lifting up the tablecloth, he pulled out an old wooden chest containing his clothes. Opening it and rummaging all the way to the bottom, he pulled out one of his most treasured possessions. It was a beautiful white dress he had made a year ago using fabric given to him by the Stylish Woman. He had fallen in love with the lacy linen at first sight, and had told the Stylish Woman that he planned on working it into a fancy tablecloth. Oh, he had worked it all right... After a few days of nimble needlework, it became a short, sleeveless summer dress with a billowing skirt. Although he only wore it during his "Link time," he had cared for and treasured it as meticulously and tenderly as he would a beloved pet.

Link quickly undressed and pulled the beautiful garment over his slender figure. His heart fluttered happily as he paused to enjoy the breezy comfort beneath the skirt and the sensation of cool air against his exposed shoulders, chest, and legs. Looking up at the mirror, he admired the way the white color made the near-flawless skin on his shoulders and neck appear almost iridescent. His cheeks were just a little rosy, and he couldn't help but feel that the sweet innocence of the lacy white dress suited him best. Just having the dress on made him feel quite pretty, but he wasn't done yet. He sat down in front of the vanity once again, and opened the top drawer.

Inside was a cluttered assortment of vials and powder trays containing all manners of beauty products. He glowed with pride at the sight of his prized toilette, thanking the goddesses for mail order catalogues. Although the drawer had become jumbled when the vanity was moved, Link could still easily spy his favorite concoctions. Once again examining his reflection with an expert eye, he giddily noted that his glowing skin wanted only for a bit of moisturizer. He pulled out a small jar of thick, unscented body cream, and sunk into bliss as he dabbed and massaged it over every uncovered inch of his fair skin. Already extraordinarily healthy, it softened even further under his fingertips and seemed to thank him for the attention.

Waiting for the body cream to sink in, Link began rummaging in search of inspiration. _Just a light powder foundation today; something to even my tones... Maybe a bit of concealer for my under-eye circles… a soft-colored lipstick, and I'll focus most of my attention on my eyes._ He began pulling out his favorite products, laying them out and attempting to decide how much of which ones to use. _Nothing too heavy, I'd say..._ _Neutral palettes really do me best, especially if I'm going for a pure, sweet look. Okay, I think the cream has set in. Let's do this._

He smirked as he picked up and opened a thin tube of light concealer, remembering the difficulties he had had trying to find a color match for his fair skin over the mail order catalogue. After five exchanges, he had finally arrived at the perfect shade, which he now dotted lightly underneath his eyes. Tapping it in with his ring fingers, he grinned in satisfaction as the heavy, dark circles disappeared beneath his touch. He dabbed a little more at the sparse, barely perceptible spots of acne discoloration on his chin and by his ears. _Perfect,_ he encouraged himself, _you have gorgeous skin, Link. Now to set it in…_ He opened the second drawer of his vanity and pulled out a well-worn powder puff, which he used to dust the tiniest bit of translucent powder over his forehead, under his eyes, on his chin and nose, and by his ears. The light powder disappeared into his skin without altering its baby-soft texture.

He paused to admire the effect. The skin on his face had changed in a way that was perceptible only to a trained eye. Having artfully concealed only the largest blemishes and erased the dark circles beneath his eyes, one would have hardly guessed his skin wasn't naturally even. Instead, the most pleasing aspects of his visage were accentuated, giving it a fresh appearance.

Link refocused his attention on his eyes. Their intense cerulean irises demanded to be the focal point. He decided they should not have to compete with his makeup for attention, and so softer tones were the way to go. It was because of this that he rather didn't mind having blond eyebrows and eyelashes, which was apparently considered a bane to many others. Rather than forcibly blacken the region around his eyes, he would work with the light coloration.

After a moment's thought, he pulled out a medium brown pencil eyeliner. It was the lightest one he owned, the color of milk chocolate. He ran it over the rim of his top eyelid, letting it extend just the tiniest bit past the lid. The effect was absolutely pleasing; he now knew how he wanted to complete his eyes. For his eyeshadow, he would use a warm coral sunset color towards the inner edge, which he would fade into a dusty rose. Above it, a rose beige highlighter. Finally, for his eyelashes a pinch with the curler and a little brown mascara on the upper and lower lashes.

As his hands worked, his long fingers delicately playing about his eyes, it felt as if a bubble were rising in his chest. He was humming; he always sang when he was happy. As he watched himself transform in the mirror, the contentment he felt rose to his curved lips in the form of a song. His voice was high- no longer the voice of a boy, not yet the voice of a man- it was clear as a crystal bell, and it disguised the rustling noises behind the table.

 _"I come to the water alone_

 _While Farore's creatures greet the sun_

 _And the beauty I see, in the ripples and trees_

 _Are but her bounties begun_

 _Minnows swim by me_

 _Dragonflies hum with me_

 _Farore tells me I'm her own_

 _And the joy I feel_

 _With splashes at my heel_

 _Are for all Hyrule to know_

 _When the cobbles shift 'neath my feet_

 _I know they do so by Din's design_

 _And the silts on the bank, which the currents replace_

 _To the ocean they will resign_

 _The mountains surround me_

 _The earth supports me_

 _And Din tells me I'm her own_

 _And the joy I feel_

 _On land where I kneel_

 _Are for all Hyrule to know_

 _I come to the water alone_

 _With Nayru's whisper in my soul_

 _And the truth that I find, with peace on my mind_

 _For her grace, I extol_

 _Sweet clarity fills me_

 _Merciful justice within me_

 _Nayru tells me I'm her own_

 _Serenity I reach_

 _Love is my heart's breach_

 _For all Hyrule to know."_

The last lyric fell from Link's lips, which were indeed the last part of her face to be given attention. Indecisive as usual when it came to her lipstick, she eventually settled on a soft, warm pink. Applying the last touches with a slightly smokier lipliner, she admired the effect with a sparkle in her cerulean eyes. She could walk out the door right now, and not a soul would mistake her for a boy. The rustling intensified. "WOAH, MR. HERO, YOU LOOK FANTASTIC!"

Link's body froze. Her heart froze. Her soul froze. She turned slowly on her stool. Behind her, lying behind the table, against the wall was a long purple figure. She was affixed by the stare of a catlike pair of blue eyes. They almost seemed alive; after mentally shaking herself, she recognized Ravio's hood.

Ravio was clambering to his feet, apparently struggling in the tight spot he had lodged himself into. "Hey, what's with that expression? Golly, you're pretty. I sure couldn't pull that look off." Link felt her lower lip trembling. _Caught. I've been caught. Seen. Looking like… looking like this (like your best) like a freak. Beautiful? Glowing? Radiant? You could never be any of those things. What are you then? A cross-dressing freak; you never were and never will be anything more._ Her voice came out in a breathless whisper, "How long have you been there?"

"Well I think since about two o'clock this afternoon. And I woke up about the time you started singing. You got a lovely voice, by the way. I've heard you singing under your breath in the shop before, but it was sure nice to hear you really burst into song!" Link barely heard what Ravio was saying. Something was swelling in her chest. It was shame, fear, defensiveness; her core was under assault. She was exposed and vulnerable, she was a cornered animal. She wanted to take wing and fly, she wanted to disappear with the wind. Ravio, her friend, who she was fond off; suddenly he was so menacing.

Were those tears of anger or fear? They rose to the end of her lacrimal ducts as she rose to her feet. It was a fluid, graceful movement. Her eyes threw sparks. "There's no need to tease me, really. That's quite enough." She turned. Where could she go? The door was locked by more than just metal. The room was open, and she had been exposed. She was trapped, yet exposed.

"Teasing? What, no! I meant it Mr. Hero, you look amazing! I mean, if I had a face like yours I'd probably get rid of this hood." If Link had seen his sly smile beneath that hood, it would have broken her. She didn't see it. Instead, her shoulders dropped almost imperceptibly. "You… do you mean that?" She focused sharply on Ravio, and the echoes in her head _(girly boy freak weirdo pretty face fairy)_ faded just slightly. "Absolutely! Like, for sure! Come on, what kind of blind fool could see you right now an- WHOOPS." Ravio's robe had caught on a splinter of the table as he clambered out from behind it, and he fell forward. Link's chest tightened. In mid-air, Ravio's hood flew up. Link's heart leapt. When Ravio landed facedown, his hood went not back over his head, but crumpled at the base of his neck. Link gazed down in shock at the sprawled Ravio. _Is that him? Why is my chest so tight? I feel a little dizzy. Ravio? That's Ravio? I feel like I shouldn't look- I know he has his own reasons for hiding his face- but I just can't avert my eyes. It's like my eyes are drinking him in of their own accord…_ His face was in the carpet, but suddenly visible to her was a mass of dark hair, short in the back and huge in the front, strangely like her own… "OUCH."

Ravio's cry brought her back to attention, her heart still racing. She quickly stepped forward and reached down toward him with one trembling hand. "Are you okay…?" she gently asked. Ravio, his face still buried in the carpet, waved her hand away and reached back to find his hood. Link felt the corners of her mouth twitch as a memory came to her. "What, does the carpet taste good or something?" she asked quietly. Ravio snorted as he pulled his hood back over his head and picked himself up. "Oh, ha ha. Think of your own lines Mr.- err, Miss- err, whatever Hero." "Either one is fine. I don't really care," Link said quickly. _What are you telling him, Link?_

"Huh? Is that so?" Ravio muttered as he dusted himself off. Link felt the dizziness sweep over her again. "Yes. I mean I'm a cross-dressing freak, so I've been called plenty worse. Not- I mean, oh, you know- I always kinda look like a girl so…" "Hey, nothing wrong with that!" Ravio cut him off. Link raised a hand to her chest, a little taken aback. _He sounds almost defensive._ "And as for the freak stuff, well I think that's a lot of jiggery pokery too. You look awesome, so you better rock it, right? What's wrong with a guy looking and dressing like a girl anyway?" Link raised a hand to his chin. _This wasn't what I expected._ "I mean it's hardly what you call normal…" Ravio waved her words aside. "Fooey upon what's "normal" and what isn't, that's what I always say. Who decides what gets to be "normal," anyway? And what's so exciting about being what everyone else says you should be? Nope, you'll be much better off just being whoever and whatever feels right to you… yep, even if what feels right is being a girl." "I don't necessarily feel like a girl…" Link mumbled. "Eh? Well then, what's with the dress and makeup?" Ravio was quick to interject.

Link sighed. _May as well hang for a Cuckoo as an egg._ "I mean that I'm not a girl. Not even in my head. But I'm certainly not a boy, either. I mean… oh Hylia, how does one say this?" _How do you articulate aloud, to someone who holds your heart in their hands, something that you've only partially admitted even to yourself?_ Link sighed yet again, sinking down onto the vanity stool, crossing her legs, and folding her hands in her lap. "Come on, Link, just spit it out," Ravio said bluntly. Yet his tone wasn't harsh. Rather, it felt to Link that the only word she heard was her name. Not "buddy," not "Mr. Hero." Link. That is she, Link. Suddenly it was clear to her. Her words came tumbling out quickly, fluidly, like water bursting from a crevice.

"I've never felt comfortable as a boy, and not just because of how my face looks. I mean masculinity as an ideal just never sat well with me. And it runs deeper than my love for pretty things and finery; it's rather like I'm a fish being told to become a bird. Except I'm not quite like a fish- metaphorically, a female, if you will- either. It's like all my life, whatever it is inside me always felt more like… well, more like just 'Link.' I'm just 'Link,' you know. I feel more comfortable taking up a feminine role, but I like to take in some qualities of masculinity as well, so that it's all blended into just _me._ I'm sorry; perhaps I'm not making any sense. I hardly make sense to myself at the moment."

Ravio was quiet for a moment, apparently thinking. "Nah, I think I gotcha," he finally replied thoughtfully, his chin resting in one hand. "You're not a boy, but you're not a girl either. You like dressing up and accentuating your feminine traits, but there are some masculine parts of you as well. You're a bunch of a qualities that all add up to you being a 'Link.' Yep, I think I got it." Link's face lit up as Ravio spoke. "Yes, yes you do have it!" Her pouting lips were now curved into a smile, and the sparks in her eyes had changed to a glitter. "I'm so glad! My goodness, I'm so glad!" she exclaimed, and let out a lovely little laugh. _He gets it. He really gets it!_ "Thank you, Ravio, really!"

Ravio was a little surprised. "Hey, nothing to thank me for! If anything, I wanna thank you!" "Hmm?" Link pursed her lips and her eyes widened; it was a quizzical expression peculiar to her, one that made Ravio's insides flutter. "Nah, I mean seriously!" he went on earnestly, "You looked so scared for moment there, so thank you for telling me!" Link's face relaxed into a soft smile. "Yeah, of course."

A brief silence fell between them, but it was warm. All sorts of things were whirling through both of their heads, but it was Ravio who spoke first. And when he did, his tone was thoughtful again. "Ya know, I got a lot to thank you for. I mean, you gave me a place to stay, and then you went and turned me into Mr. Moneybags- I meant it when I said you gave me a new perspective on life, ya know- and now you're still letting me crash here and do nothing all day while you're out risking your skin. But you've always treated me like a friend, ya know? I could have been anybody, just somebody trying to use you, but you never treated me that way."

At this, Link smiled sweetly. _It's difficult not to be kind to someone like you, Ravio. You mean a lot more to me than you know._ "Ravio, Mama always told me it's the easiest thing in the world to distrust people." Ravio looked up, his slightly bewildered expression concealed beneath his hood. "Oh, I mean the Blacksmith's wife," Link explained. "Anyway, she always told me that anybody can be cynical, or mistrusting, or wary of others. It's the simplest thing, to go about as if you're the only person in the world with a heart." She drew in a breath before continuing. "But I've always wanted to be someone stronger than that. Not to say I don't think anyone will ever hurt me- to be honest, I'm terrified of that- but I want to believe that if I am hurt I'll fall on my feet. And I also want to believe that I'm not the only person who wants to trust others. It's the more difficult, but perhaps the more correct thing, to remember that others are just people, like you. They may have their own motives, but they also have their own reasons. So I don't mind if I get hurt; I'll be someone strong enough to take it. So really, Ravio, I have no reason not to be your friend." Link was quiet for a moment longer, apparently lost in thought, before she spoke once again. "I suppose if I really followed that ideal, though, I would have told you about myself sooner."

Who knows what Link would have said if she could have seen the look on Ravio's face? The truth is that he was amazed at the words she spoke, amazed to hear such a thing, having lived his life in a cold world of chaos. But he didn't think her wrong; he saw that she was brave, brave for the way she lived her life. _What an idea,_ he thought, _she sets herself up for disappointment, not because she believes it'll turn out fine, but because she is unafraid of failure. I guess this is what they call "inner strength."_ But this he did not voice aloud. Instead, his next words were playful and cheery.

"You got some unique thoughts in that head of yours, Mr. Hero. But for now, how about you sing me another song?" "What?" Link was taken aback by the sudden request. "I mean come on, you're already all dolled up," Ravio insisted. "What's the point if you don't at least do something special? Put on a show for me; I'd really love to hear you. I might even sing along!" Link's surprised expression softened, and her lips curved into a radiant smile. All at once she seemed to glow, an image in white, like an angel in her joy. "I suppose I can sing a song or two, if it's for you, Ravio."


	2. Ravio's Journal

_**For more of my work, please check out my DeviantArt: DrBadassPhD**_

 _Hiya Journal,_

Talk about exhausting! Anyway, I'm back in Lorule, the Triforce has been restored, Hyrule's hero came out on top, their world is safe, yada yada. Everything is fine. Grand, just grand. Well, my house is still a wreck, and frankly I'm unsure about my employment status. Princess Hilda didn't say anything about it; I thought I shouldn't ask while she was busy celebrating the reestablishment of her kingdom, ya know? She might need a bit of help getting everything back in order, though, especially if those chasms don't close themselves. She'll need someone to get started on bridges and roads, and she should know that if she needs something built I'm her man! Well, I guess even if she fires me I still got a sack of rupees from my little merchant stint. Maybe I can be a toy inventor, or a farmer, or well, anything. Yep, everything's fine. Welp, I'm tired, so I think I'm gonna try to get a little shut-eye in.

 _Ravio_

 **Later**

Aww, shucks, everything's not alright. I can't get to sleep until I get this out of my system. Everything is about as far from alright as it's ever been. Like the kingdoms are saved and that's grand and all, but I'm not okay. No, I'm not worried about my job. I already told you if I fall I can land on my feet. Nah, it's about Link. I really did him wrong, and the rupees are just the tip of the dung heap.

Okay, so I did save the guy's life. But I'm gonna be honest, when I found him in the Sanctuary of Hyrule I didn't actually give a rat's ass about him. I was just like, "Yay, I found the guy who looks like me! Time to get him to save Lorule!" So yeah, I saved him, but only so I could throw him right back into the frying pan. Look, I know saving Lorule isn't something I could have done myself, but I still can't feel at ease saying it was okay to make Link do it. And I think the biggest reason for that is that Link himself was so damn kind about it.

Journal, when I went looking for Link I expected to find a guy like me. Not just in the face, either. I mean I expected someone cynical and manipulative and cold. Except I thought they'd also be like a better version of myself, like they'd also be brave and capable to make up for it, whereas I am pretty lacking in the department of redeeming qualities. Instead, and let me be clear that I mean this in every way imaginable, I found that Link is simply _beautiful._

They had my own pretty face, of course, but with blond hair and blue eyes, but that wasn't the biggest difference. It's the look in their eyes that's most different from me. When they look at you it's like you can tell they care, like they want to get to know you, and that their heart is warm, loving, and gentle. I thought it'd be a real hassle getting to freeload and set up shop in their house, but Link went and told me to make myself right at home, and was out the door to save Hyrule without a moment's hesitation!

And then they came home so tired, and I did feel just a twinge of pity for them. But they weren't the least bit grumpy with me; instead, they asked if I was settling in okay and whipped me up some dinner! I was feeling uncomfortable about this to say the least. It would have been a lot easier to take advantage of them if they at least whined a bit about it. Instead, Link did everything they could to make me feel right at home and even acted glad of my company. They're pretty shy and reserved, but also pretty perceptive and curious about people; an odd combination of traits, I have to say.

Well, even after this good treatment I had to harden up my heart and set up my merchant thing. While I was in Lorule it was a pretty easy matter to just think "Yeah, I'll help the hero by giving them my inventions, but to throw them off my scent I'll take money for it!" Oh, but of course I got worried about my "precious" inventions being lost or stolen if the hero wiped out, so I came up with the whole rental scheme. But now that I was in Hyrule, being cared for so graciously by Link, I start to think about all the rupees I was going to cost him and how it'd put him in a tight spot, having to think about whether he could financially afford to save Hyrule (and Lorule). I eased my conscience (for a little bit, anyway) by giving them a few discounts.

And then it was onto the adventure. It was four weeks of hell for Link, I could tell. Don't get me wrong- Link's spirit is strong and I never once heard a complaint- but when he came home covered in injuries, and especially this one time he almost froze to death, it really hit home what I was pushing him to do. For the sake of my own home, which Link technically shouldn't have to hold any responsibility for, Link was dancing toe to toe with death. Yep, I'm pretty sure he almost died more than once, not that he'd ever tell me. But the states Sheerow found him in, let me tell you. Would you guess that Link, the hero of Hyrule, is terrified of darkness? He didn't sleep for days while clearing the Dark Palace. I remember thinking at least that bit was over for him, and then him still twitching in his sleep, then jerking awake drenched in cold sweat. I don't think he ever knew I saw this, and I never had the courage to comfort him. I couldn't help but think of the role I had played in what he was going through.

Okay, I mean, I knew Yuga was going to target Hyrule and go for their Sages and Princess too. I knew that if we stole their Triforce Hyrule would up like Lorule, a crumbling world of chaos. So yes, it was very much in both mine and Link's interest, not to mention the interest of all the inhabitants of both kingdoms, for them to go on their quest. I guess what really bothered me is that while I was in Lorule I just thought of them as the "Hero," some guy who would solve all my problems because of course that's what heroes do. But when I started living with Link I think it dawned upon me that they are in fact a person with their own doubts and fears, and that they're shouldering a huge responsibility despite not being a day older than my own tender 15 years, and above all I started to notice that Link has a truly deep, pure personality.

It wasn't difficult to like them at all. I don't even know how to begin to describe Link. They're pure, kind, gentle, and sweet, to give you a list of adjectives, but there's more than that. They move with this peculiar kind of grace, they radiate an aura of comfort, and even their very voice I found produced a soothing effect on me. Link is incredibly thoughtful and observant, yet they also often had this distant look in their eyes, like their mind was on another planet. And when they talk, their speech patterns are odd and elegant, and they have a way of playing with words and producing the most beautiful, original thoughts. Okay, so maybe they're a little aloof despite their caring friendliness, maybe sometimes I couldn't keep up with what they were saying, and maybe I think they keep too much to themselves, but who am I kidding? I think they're perfect. It really didn't take me long. After an hour I felt at my core, "Oh, I like this person." I'd think about them all day, and to tell you the truth I think I was making rather a project out of trying to figure them out, something I've never really cared to do with anyone else before. Then, after a week, that "I like this person" just turned into "I love this person."

All that love nonsense Hilda likes to go on about always sounded like a load of frippery to me before. A bunch of romanticizing of what was probably a very simple feeling of attraction. After all, feelings are always changing, and there's no need to read into them more there is at the surface, right? Or at least, that's how I thought before I met Link. I didn't know the thought of a person could really make you feel dizzy, or faint, that their voice could send shocks of joy through you, that it was possible to _care_ so much. I've never thought that just an expression on a person's face, a word, a look, or those little things romantic types likes to go on about could be so beautiful. But with Link it's like everything seems to glow; they're perfect.

I don't know, it's not like I've never loved anyone. I mean, I definitely love Princess Hilda like a sister. I've thought about taking things further than that, but it's like she's so irascible, despite her good intentions, I really don't think I'd be able to properly enjoy a relationship with her. But I definitely love her like my best friend and sister, and that's just not ever going to change. That's why I'm totally ready for her to fire me or send me to slammer for deserting; I don't really care, as long as she's learned her lesson about choosing who to place her trust in (i.e. not creeps like Yuga). But still, with Princess Hilda I've never had a problem getting irritated with her for her flaws, and she's definitely never made me feel like I was losing my head.

But with Link, it's like I know that they've got their own little quirks, but I just don't mind it a particle. If they were my princess, I sure couldn't imagine ever leaving their employment like I can totally imagine doing to Princess Hilda if she ever goofs up like that again. And then there's this way they make me feel, like they walk into the room and suddenly I can't think. I feel like Link could do anything, be anything, and whatever it is they make me feel wouldn't change a particle. I still remember the night I realized my attraction to them was more than just a physical thing or plain curiosity. It was after Link bought out my shop and I was just lounging about the house one day, and ending up falling asleep behind the table. When I woke up, Link was sitting at this vanity I thought I had stowed away, wearing this lacy white dress and putting on makeup. At first, you could imagine the shock I felt; I had just caught the Hero in the middle of cross-dressing. But then I noticed this look on their face. They looked more than just happy; that was bliss. And the sparkle in their blue eyes as they were dolling themselves up… it was appealing in a way I don't know how to describe. Link was singing a Hyrulean hymn; did I mention that they have a beautiful voice? Their voice is in the tenor range like mine, but theirs have a different quality to it. It's pure and clear, yet full, like the voice of a seraph. They were singing a song of thanks to ancient goddesses, meanwhile just radiating this pure beauty. Because let me tell you, Link looked every bit like a beautiful young woman; in fact, he's much prettier even than many girls I know. Even prettier than the Princesses Hilda and Zelda. Anyway, just seeing that look on his face and in his eyes, and listening to his voice, it hit me that in that moment Link was truly in their element.

Yes, I think at heart they're a gentle beauty. They're courageous, but what comes to them most naturally are qualities such as kindness, compassion, and mysticism. When they finished singing and appeared done with their makeup I just had to tell them how beautiful they were, although I had a feeling what they were doing was rather private to them. I thought I had messed up bad, for a second there, they looked so l like a frightened rabbit. They almost started crying, from the shock and embarrassment I think. They called themselves all kinds of horrible things, things I felt in my heart were just untrue, like a "freak" and a "fuckup." It took some coaxing to calm them down; I don't really know how I did it. All I know is that I just wanted them to know I didn't think of them that way at all. They seemed even more surprised when I got that across to them. They looked at me with these big puppy dog eyes, like they couldn't quite believe me but desperately wanted to, and it was like in that moment my heart melted. That's another sensation I've discovered to be very, very real. I just wanted them to know there isn't a thing wrong with who they are, and that I thought the world of them. Link really opened up to me after that. They told me that they've never really felt comfortable as a boy, and had always been teased for looking girly, but in truth they really liked that femininity and in many ways felt more comfortable in a feminine role, hence why they enjoy dressing up. But they also said they've never really thought of themselves as a girl either, and instead they've always privately considered themselves just to be "Link." But this is something they've never expressed to a soul, afraid of how it could damage their relationships and reputation. Isn't that just the saddest thing you've ever heard? Could you imagine having to hide something so close to the core of your self-identity? It's cruel, and it broke my heart.

Anyway, it's things like that, getting to know Link and love him, that make me feel so regretful. I wish I could have shared more in the burden that he bore. Even all these rupees, once so coveted, feel hateful to me because I took them from Link. But the worst part of all this is that I never told them how I felt and think about them. I never properly expressed to them how I feel like they changed me. I mean I kind of did, joking around after I retired, but still not really. It's like before meeting Link I felt pretty resigned to just trying to get by in all kinds of underhanded and ignoble ways, but they made me feel like it was possible to be at least a little bit heroic. I am still a coward at heart, but I feel like I could at least try to live for others, to try to be my best self. After all, now I know what it's like to love someone, to love everything about them, to never want to leave them.

But I guess I have left them. He's in Hyrule, and I'm in Lorule, and our lives our going to go on, drifting further apart from that brief time when we knew each other… I don't want that. Fuckin' hell, I want them back. See, I really am a coward. I never fessed up my feelings. Not even when we parted that last time, and I knew that Princess Hilda was gonna have to use the last of the bracelet's power to send them back home. I couldn't even casually say, "Hey, I love you, buddy," so that even if they never knew I love them like that, they'd at least know they're loved at all. That kind of thing means a lot to Link, ya know? They really value the emotions of others, I think probably because they're someone who cares so deeply themselves. I feel sure they did care about me; they never approached me as a roommate, but as a friend. And that look in their eyes when we parted… I still don't know what this look was exactly, but I do know that they were hurt. They looked shocked and hurt. They didn't even answer me when I said my goodbyes; they just stared.

You know what? I'd do just about anything to see them again. I've been wondering if there's some way I can invent another bracelet, but with the gaps between Hyrule and Lorule closing I'll sure have to work fast. It may already be too late; the portal through the Sacred Realm may have been the last one. But no, I can't give up like that. Link taught me that you never get anything by giving up. After all, if they had given up, both Hyrule and Lorule would be doomed. So no, I just gotta get creative. I have to apply my wits to this. I don't know if I can rely on anyone to help me- maybe not even Princess Hilda- but I know I have to try. I'll figure something out. I've just got to see Link again. I might be cowardly, and conniving, and in many respects useless, but I still have the ability to be a friend. If anything, I at least want to tell Link how sorry I am, and to let them know what they mean to me. As for the love thing? Well, I guess that'd be up to Link's feelings. Wouldn't it be just wonderful, just impossibly amazing, if Link loves me too? I mean I hope they don't love me right now, because they'd be feeling pretty torn up, but it'd be great that if we met again and had time to be friends they could come to feel that way towards me. I'm pretty flawed, it's true, but I don't think I'm a bad guy, and anyway Link is the sort of person who brings out the good in others. Well anyway, it's getting pretty late, so I guess this is good night. I promise the next time I write, I'll be telling you all about mine and Link's reunion!

 _Ravio_


End file.
